Foundational Attitude of Mindfulness: Trust

"Trust is a feeling of confidence or conviction that things can unfold within a dependable framework that embodies order and integrity." -- Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are

By that definition, trusting can offer a sense of stability and security that comes from knowing there is a system, an order to the way things unfold. After all, we each have the natural human instinct to keep ourselves safe from harm and danger and, generally, we trust in that instinct by acting upon it (that is, we fight, flee, or freeze depending on the circumstance). In another sense, trust is also a letting go of fear. If you're afraid of something that might happen in the future, it might prevent you from taking a particular action. But if you trust that you can handle the possibilities of that potential future situation and you can handle yourself in that scenario (as in "You got this!"), you can let go of the fear and move into that action.

Developing a sense of trust in yourself is integral to mindfulness practice. Finding your own internal truth, your own agency, means to become more fully and authentically you. In cultivating this, you learn to trust your own intuition rather than look for guidance outside yourself. In a sense this is about discovering and embodying your own power rather than giving it away because you trust someone else more than you trust yourself.

In starting or returning to a practice like meditation or yoga, you may be tempted to follow the leadership of experts. And it's not wrong or bad to seek guidance and training, but you need not emulate nor be manipulated by anyone else whether they claim to be an expert or not. Teachers and videos and books are available to provide guidelines and it can be helpful to be open and receptive to their teachings. But you are the expert of you! Trust that you know yourself, your body, your feelings, your thoughts better than anyone else can know them. No one else is living in your body or in your head or in your heart! No one else is experiencing what you are experiencing in the way you are experiencing it in any given moment. If you've ever visited a medical doctor who was dismissive of something you've told him or her, you have an idea of what I'm talking about. Although MDs are experts in the physical body in general, their expertise is not You specifically. Sometimes you have a gut feeling, an instinct, that what the doctor is telling you is not really the answer, right? In these moments do you trust your instincts? Do you give your personal power and agency (and in this case, your health and well-being) to someone who is not an expert in You?

The same holds true in meditation and yoga. A yoga instructor may cue to straighten the legs but you know that for your body, you need a micro-bend in the knees to either prevent hamstring pulls or knee hyperextension or some other potential pain or injury. In this situation, you are wholly within your body, observing, noticing, and doing what is suitable for you regardless of what the instructor is prompting. And that is perfectly perfect! You trust yourself to know how far you can take that motion or that pose. And you honor your body and your consciousness by doing what works best for you in that moment of awareness and embodiment. You are not dishonoring the teacher or anyone else by being honest and truthful and trusting in yourself.

How do we begin this process of cultivating trust? Start with this moment. What is present? The breath, your heart beat, what you are feeling in your body. Can you trust the feeling of air moving in and out of your nostrils as you breathe? Can you trust in your ability to observe and attend to whatever is happening in this moment? What fears do you have? Can you sit in stillness with awareness, simply being tuned in to this moment? Can you acknowledge, accept and release the fears even the slightest bit? Can you start to trust that things will unfold in their own time, in the natural way of things, and that you will instinctively, intuitively know what to do or how to be in that moment of unfolding?

Your instincts may not always be right. But that doesn't necessarily make them wrong or bad. It doesn't mean you should lose trust in your instincts. Rather it is an opportunity to dive deeper into the moment of discovering a "mistake" or a "failure", to use the opportunity to be open and receptive to what lessons you can learn and take with you into the next moment and the next and the next. It seems paradoxical but actually these moments of "error in judgement" are each a chance to develop even more trust in yourself, to be honest with yourself in any given situation, to honor that and to deepen the trust and self-confidence in the recognition of your ability to learn and grow.

In large part, mindfulness is a practice of taking responsibility and learning to trust yourself, a process of becoming more wholly You. The more you are able to cultivate the feeling of trust in yourself, the more you will be authentically you, owning your internal truth.